What Happens in a Workplace Mediation? A Step-by-Step Guide

If you've been asked to take part in a workplace mediation, or you're a manager considering one for your team, the first question is usually simple: what actually happens? Not knowing makes people anxious, and anxiety makes a hard conversation harder. This guide walks through the process step by step, so everyone can walk in knowing what to expect.

The short version

A workplace mediation usually runs over one to three weeks, in four stages:

1. A first conversation to check mediation is the right fit
2. A private pre-mediation meeting with each person
3. A joint session, typically half a day
4. A written agreement, then a follow-up check-in

Step 1: The first conversation

Most workplace mediations start with a call from a manager, HR or a business owner. Sometimes an employee raises it themselves.

This conversation covers what's happening, who's involved and what's already been tried. It also checks whether anything makes mediation the wrong tool, such as allegations of serious misconduct that need investigating, or a risk to someone's safety. (Our guide to mediation or investigation explains the difference.)

The practical details are agreed here too: who is paying (usually the employer), where and when the sessions will happen, and what the organisation will and won't be told afterwards. At Core Mediation, this first conversation is a free, confidential 15-minute call.

Step 2: Pre-mediation meetings

Before anyone sits in a room together, the mediator meets each person separately and confidentially, usually for about an hour. This step generally takes place virtually, but in-person sessions can be arranged.

Most of the groundwork happens here. Each person can explain their side without interruption, say what matters to them and raise any worries about the joint session. The mediator explains the process and checks that each person is taking part willingly.

These meetings also let the mediator spot anything that would make a joint session unsafe or unfair, such as a significant power imbalance, and adjust the process or recommend a different approach. What's said stays confidential unless that person agrees otherwise.

One of the most common themes that comes through during pre-mediation is the desire for each party's perspective to be at the very least acknowledged by the other.

Step 3: The joint session

The joint session is where the conversation happens. In most workplace matters it runs for three to four hours. However, timing varies with the matter and the parties' willingness to engage. It usually follows this sequence:

1. Opening. The mediator sets out the ground rules: respectful communication, confidentiality, and that the mediator is impartial and won't decide who's right.
2. Each person's perspective. Each person has uninterrupted time to describe what's happened and how it has affected them.
3. Setting the agenda. Together they list the issues to work through, such as communication, workload or how meetings run.
4. Exploring the issues. The mediator helps each person understand the other's view and what sits underneath each position.
5. Private sessions, if needed. The mediator may meet each person alone partway through, to test ideas or give space when emotions run high.
6. Options and agreement. The parties work out practical options and agree what will change.

The mediator manages the process. The people involved own the outcome.

Step 4: The written agreement

Most mediations end with a short written agreement setting out what each person has committed to. Good agreements are specific and practical, for example:

• "We'll raise concerns with each other directly within 48 hours, not through other people."
• "Team meetings will have an agenda circulated the day before."
• "We'll meet for 15 minutes every fortnight for the next two months to check in."

The parties agree in advance what, if anything, goes to the manager or HR. Often it's simply that the mediation took place, plus any actions that need the organisation's support.

Step 5: Follow-up

A check-in a few weeks later helps agreements stick. It's a chance to ask what's working, what isn't and whether anything needs adjusting. This can be managed directly by the parties involved or with Core Mediation's involvement.

Who attends?

Usually just the people directly involved and the mediator. Managers and HR typically stay out of the joint session, because their presence changes the conversation; they may be involved before or after. Support people and lawyers aren't usually part of a workplace mediation, but this can be discussed during pre-mediation.

Is it confidential?

Yes. What's said in mediation stays in mediation, with narrow exceptions such as a serious risk to someone's safety or where the law requires disclosure. The mediator explains these limits at the start.

What if we don't reach agreement?

Not every mediation ends in full agreement, and that isn't failure. Partial agreements are common, and people usually leave understanding each other better than when they arrived. If mediation isn't enough on its own, options include a facilitated team discussion, coaching for one or both people, or a formal process.

How to prepare

• Think about what you'd like to be different, not just what went wrong.
• Note the two or three issues that matter most to you.
• Consider what the other person might say, and what might be true in it.
• Come willing to listen, even if you don't agree.

Ready to talk it through?

If tension in your team isn't resolving on its own, a free, confidential 15-minute consultation is the place to start. You can also read more about our workplace mediation service.